"This is an important announcement. ...

This is Flight 121 to Los Angeles. If your travel plans today do not include Los Angeles, now would be the perfect time to disembark."

Ich lese gerade The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxa - So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish" und habe gerade den genannten Text gelesen, da fällt mir gerade eine selber erlebte Episode ein:

Ich war vor einer ganzen Weile mit Ryan Air in Großbritannien unterwegs (d.h. von London nach Glasgow). Jeder, der fliegt, kennt sie, die Sicherheits-Bekanntmachungen. Fliegt man öfters, kriegt man sie inzwischen kaum mehr mit.

Die Sicherheitsanweisungen zu Beginn von jenem Flug waren aber anders. Ich erinnere mich leider nur noch an wenige Weisungen (auch der Wortlaut mag nicht exakt sein):

...in case of loss of cabine pressure, stop screaming, take the nozzle...
...the life jackets have a flash light, in case we land in a disco....

Und weitere solche scherzhaften Bemerkungen. Das ganze Flugzeug hat gelacht. UND bzw. ABER: Das ganze Flugzeug war aufmerksam.

Ich kann nur im nachhinein und nicht dem Flugbegleiter persönlich sagen: Das war Klasse. Hut ab. Es war toll, dass hier der Chef-Steward Dynamik reingebracht hat. Wahrscheinlich gibt es (leider) Leute, die so etwas nicht lustig finden (es ist ja eine ernsthafte Angelegenheit) - nur ich selber denke, wenn man ab und zu etwas mehr Elan und Unerwartetes präsentiert, hat man das Publikum auf seiner Seite. Positiv auf seiner Seite. Ich will hier nun nicht philosophisch werden, nur, Gelassenheit, Spontaneität und Witz ist etwas, was man heutzutage leicht vermissen mag beziehungsweise vielmehr gelebt werden sollt.


P.S.: Ich kann somit auch den Hitchhiker's Guide nur empfehlen - denn in diesem Buch wird Witz und Satire in herrlicher Art gelebt.

Man in the Mirror

that's what Michael Jackson sang about, and this swan Saturday's Daily Express told us of must have got it all wrong.

A black swan living on a lake in Germany appears to have fallen in love
with with a swan-shaped paddle boat. The real swan has not left the boat's
side since it arrived on the lake in Munster, protecting it by chasing away any
other boats that approach.

Poor thing, this reems really one-sided to me...

Fame

... is by David Bowie, of course, and here's the proof you can talk me into pretty much everything...

I'm on Tay FM's website.

*duckundwech* (I don't think you can translate this to English, sorry)

Kind and Generous

That's what Natalie Merchant sang about... Comes in many guises.

Time – ‘just call me when you’ve got news, no matter what time it is’
A skirt or a pair of boots or a shirt – ‘don’t fit me, have them’
A mobile – ‘I’ll get a new one with the new contract anyway’
Theatre – ‘got a spare ticket… want to join in?’
Sympathy – ‘you know, I sort of had 5 grandparents'
Dinner – ‘just come along, I always cook for a battalion’
A night out – ‘och, come on, it’s my pleasure, choose whatever you like from the menu’
Advice – ‘did they present you with the solution on a silver tray?’
Gratitude – ‘the Duplo fairy is back from holiday’
Humour – ‘I’m appealing [to this] – yes, you are appealing’
A lift – ‘no, it’s no detour; I really need milk in the middle of the night’
Old virtues – ‘carrying your bag to the station at 5.30am on a Saturday is fine, I don’t mind, a taxi would cost 4 quid’
A place to stay for the night – ‘if you don’t mind sleeping on the floor (on blankets, duvets, and with everything being taken care of), you’re more than welcome’
Books – ‘och, I’ll zip ‘em and you’ll have them in no time’ (woman, it took ages to transfer them!)
A Cafetière – ‘would only collect dust in my cupboard, and… didn’t know if you have proper coffee over there, so I enclosed some. And sugar, milk, and biscuits, just in case’
Support – always, forever, under all circumstances; morally, financially, tons of chocolate
A bottle of whisky – ‘because I don’t drink it anyway’
Dinner again – ‘any plans for tonight? We thought of going out for dinner, wanna join in?’
BigMac prices – ‘yeah, I just called the branch to find out – why?’
Pride – ‘I think she did… really well’
IT support – ‘I consulted my 700-page manual and I think it’s this… no, it’s only 11.50pm, why?’
Communication – ‘why, you said you can’t use ICQ any longer, so I got an account’
Travelling – ‘I’ve booked the flight’
Mallorca – ‘3 raciones de Jamón Serrano, 4 cañas, una copa de rosado, y un agua sin gas, gracias’
Promptness – ‘the parcel has just arrived; you can pick it up from the office’Pride – ‘I think she did… really well'

Life's good, isn't it?